Sunday, January 23, 2011

Tomchuck, Best Hair, and Who Cares

The big story on Tuesday night's State of the Union address is who is sitting with whom. The New York Times has an article Sunday about the mad scramble for seating partners. Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell is choosing self-imposed wallflowerdom at what is turning into Congressional Prom Night. He made the big reveal at one of the Sunday morning talk shows. I forget which one; they all blend into one huge blatherfest and they're much like the musical chairs game the politicians are playing in Washington. Celebrity politician guest-hopping from one softball interview to the next.

The first odd couple to grab the headlines about their big date were Chuck Schumer (D-NY) and Tom Coburn (R-OK). In the spirit of celebrity name-blending, I hereby dub them Tomchuck (hope that doesn't make you up-chuck).

And what about this week's (and every week's) Senate prima donna, Joe Lieberman (?-CT). So far nobody wants to date him. But I hear he'll make up for it by grabbing two seats and spending the entire evening jumping back and forth between them.

Here's the bottom line. President Obama is evidently thrilled at all the attention the social life of the Congress is getting. It's all that much less attention the content of the speech will be getting from the TV pundits. The thrill Chris Matthews gets up his leg this time won't be from O - it'll be when the camera pans long and lustfully at Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY), this year's perfect-hair shoo-in for Senate prom queen. Probably nobody will even notice if the president calls for more troops in Afghanistan, privatization of Social Security, the appointment of Lloyd Blankfein to a new cabinet post of Trickle Down Economics Chief and tax breaks for corporations which choose to outsource even more jobs overseas.

But the peak moment will have to be when Michelle Bachmann (R-MN) gives the Tea Party rebuttal to the Republican rebuttal to the president's speech. I can't wait to see how big she does her hair, whether she'll outdo Sarah Palin in octave-spanning, and if she'll be sporting a chic new designer flag pin. The TV tells us that kind of stuff is important, so it must be true.


marieburns said...

But, but you didn't mention the man Queen Kirsten chose as her King -- John Thune of South Dakota, whose other title is Senator Who Looks Most Like a President. Never mind that he's a knee-jerk numbskull; he's tall, he's handsome, he can slow-dance -- he's the perfect date!

The control room will run as many two-shots of that good-looking couple on prom night -- I mean SOTU night -- as they did of the gorgeous Mrs. Kucinich during the 2008 Democratic presidential primary debates.

The Constant Weader

Karen Garcia said...

Ah yes, King John the Divine. Nominations are now open for runners-up, aka Prince and Princess - or Prince and Prince, Princess and Princess, whatever. Or if you want to vote for just Joe Lieberman, there's a court jester/class clown category too.

mivogo said...

I am disappointed that Alan Grayson has disappeared from the Congressional scene. I would have coupled him with Joe Wilson. That would prove that civility has truly taken hold in Congress. Or possibly the State of the Union ending in a fistfight. Big ratings!


Anonymous said...

Karen Garcia-
My wife and I have read, enjoyed, and agreed with your NYY blogs on the op-ed page this past year. In fact, we think that the NYT should give you your own op-ed column.
Your analytical abilities are superb, and I suppose that it because I find myself always in agreement with you.
Keep up the cause- check out the and get a job there-- you are certainly superior to Howard Feinman.
Steve and Maureen

Anonymous said...

Okay, I think we should replace Brooks and Collins' shared column with Garcia and Burns. Or, with a nod to Burns & Allen, it could be Burns and Garcia.

Love that I can read the more substantive back-and-forth here. I really like Collins, but she deserves a smarter conservative with whom to "dialogue."

eva c.

Jay, Ottawa said...

After reading Maureen Dowd this morning (30 Jan 2011), I think you should ask the Times for her spot on the Op-Ed page. Dowd has succumbed utterly to Obambi's charm, not to mention that of Obambi's squirrel friends like David Axelrod, to whom Dowd has just written a long Valentine.