Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Bloomer Rumor

He is not, he nasally drawls, running for president. He is devoted to the third term he paid millions of dollars of his own good earned money for, and he's going to abide. He owes it to the financiers of New York. He's not a quitter.That's why Mayor Mike Bloomberg is on the road telling everybody who will listen that Barack Obama is a gigantic disgrace of a failure over the collapse of the Supercommittee --but that he, the Duke of Omnium, is not not I repeat not interested in mounting a third party challenge.

MSNBC's Andrea Mitchell just coyly asked (sorry, no clip available yet) if he is running, and he did the mildly affronted act as only a muted shrillionaire can. No, he (paraphrasingly) said with a moue: I am only making the rounds of the national teevee talk shows to bitch about what a mealy-mouthed weakling Obama has turned out to be. We need my a balanced approach, the midpoint of sanity between crazy liberalism and crazy Tea Partyism.  I am the dream come true of the David Brooks/Tom Friedman school of mythical centrist punditry. I am the genteel sloppy seconds of Chris Christie. I am the CEO king of Third Way. I scoff at the notion that the banks had anything at all to do with the financial collapse.  That was Congress, forcing the banks to lend money to the lesser people to buy homes that were not entitled to. I am the great elite hope of Wall Street. I vanquished Zuccotti Park, did I not?

The corporate media are in awe of the Audacity of Oligarchy. They are marching in lockstep and breathlessly calling the Bloomberg Media Tour a "rare public rebuke"  of a sitting president.

Not to be outdone by Obama's famous Sunday night announcement of the death of Osama, Bloomer even staged his own Sunday night presser with his sidekick Ray Kelly to announce the existence of his very own terrorist, who was about to blow up all kinds of stuff with Christmas tree lights and matches. Bloomer outfitted himself in a casual orange sweater for the affair to show what a relaxed informal Bob Newharty rich guy he is.  He even played a video produced just for the special occasion. It showed a car getting blown up by New York's finest. Mayor Shrillionaire did not say if he paid for the stunt out of his own good money, or if the taxpayers will foot the bill. He did insinuate, however, that the Obama Justice Dept./FBI fell down on the job and that it was only through the dedication of his private NYPD security force that he kept New Yorkers safe from a mentally challenged, informant-groomed, "lone wolf" threat.  

A recent Wall Street Journal/NBC Poll shows that Bloomer would get 13 percent of the vote in the general election and that Ron Paul would garner 18 percent. Foursome, anyone?  Actually, a sextet would do nicely. I nominate Bernie and Ralph.

Bloomer in His Lone Wolf Hunting Sweater


DreamsAmelia said...

You are really on a roll! ...at least providing laughs in the endless tragi-comedy of the politics train--
"The corporate media are in awe of the Audacity of Oligarchy."
Maybe, too, he chose the orange sweater as part of the color code terrorist alert system (orange=really bad boogey men out there, maybe even next to you on the subway!)--and also to make sure no one would confuse him as having any closet sympathies with the Code Pink group, being such a champion of the First Amendment as he is (when the Times unironically printed that allegation, a pity they failed to provide any evidence as he was evicting protesters)

Krugman said it best on Sunday, "only fools and clowns" can believe in Republican ideology. Bloomie would make a perfectly foolish enough clown to be Court-Jester-in-Chief, should he ever choose to buy himself into a Presidential seat.

DreamsAmelia said...

Here's part of the infuriating clip:


Correction to Bloomie--The people were NEVER chanting,
"We don't know what we want, but we want it now."
Yes, we know he is so unimaginative to make up something that is not even credible! (Guess creative staff writers who would feed him better sound bite lies are too expensive....)

No, from New York to Washington, the chants I chanted and heard resounding loudly down the canyons of the streets were:

"You say, Cut Back, WE SAY FIGHT BACK"

"We ARE the 99 percent--and so are you!"

"What do we want?
To tax the rich!
When do we want it?

"What do we want?
Wall st. trading tax!
When do we want it?

Denis Neville said...

Ubekki-Beki-Bekistan and the Audacity of Oligarchy in Our Wars on Terror…

David Trilling at Foreign Policy asks, “Why is the Pentagon spending tens of millions of U.S. tax dollars to whitewash the image of Central Asian dictatorships?”


“Over the past three years, a subdivision of Virginia-based General Dynamics has set up and run a network of eight "influence websites" funded by the Defense Department with more than $120 million in taxpayer money. The sites, collectively known as the Trans Regional Web Initiative (TRWI) and operated by General Dynamics Information Technology, focus on geographic areas under the purview of various U.S. combatant commands, including U.S. Central Command. In its coverage of Uzbekistan, a repressive dictatorship increasingly important to U.S. military goals in Afghanistan, a TRWI website called Central Asia Online has shown a disturbing tendency to downplay the autocracy's rights abuses and uncritically promote its claims of terrorist threats.”

Russian Proverb - “Hypocrites kick with their hind feet while licking with their tongues.”

Kat said...

Perhaps when he dressed up like a pumpkin-- orange and green-- he did so in honor of the kindergarten quality of this terror plot.
Duke of Omnium-- yes, that works.

James F Traynor said...

And a Pleasant, if not Happy, Thanksgiving to all.

John in Lafayette said...

I can see the bumper stickers now:

Bloomberg for President!
Cut Out the Middle Man!

Will said...

Where does the Occupy movement go from here? These 10 suggestions from Michael Moore are definitely a good place to start:


P.S. You might want to mention a few of these ideas at dinner tomorrow right after your asshole Uncle Bob condescendingly dismisses us as a bunch of dirty clueless hippies again. You won't change HIS tiny little mind, of course, but your other relatives will have something interesting to think about.

Another world is possible.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Anne Lavoie said...

Happy Thanksgiving, and don't forget, your right to camp out in front of a shopping mall will be protected and respected. Just don't call it Occupying.